I have taken the last 2 weeks to sort through my feelings on what I am about to share, so I'm very sorry for the silence. The day after Thanksgiving, the director of the Ethiopia program called and told us that things had not gone well in court. The court did not rule in our favor. There was an issue with the birth family (nothing to do with our papers or our agency). Unfortunately, Baby Z will not be coming home to live with us; but I do hope that he will be reunited with his family and sibling.
That has been my prayer for him since the day we learned of the details surrounding his relinquishment. I believe God placed him in our hearts for the last two months so that we could pray the will of the Lord over his life. Despite sounding like a platitude, I truly do trust that God's will has been done in this situation.
Our family has grieved somewhat over the loss. In fact, I have felt similarly to what I experienced after my miscarriage. Although I did not know this baby, he already lived in my heart and so the loss was real. His name, his pictures, the things around the house that were bought especially for him, and the hope of bringing him home for his 1st Christmas...those things were all very real to us and had to be laid at the foot of Jesus, trusting that He is enough for us and for that little one. I have to believe that His Heavenly Father loves him more than we or his birthparents ever could. That is why I trust that this story will have a good ending for Baby Z.
In the meantime, we have been offered a referral for a one month old. We are currently awaiting the remainder of the medicals so that the agency can officially present us with the referral package. I am hoping it will be tomorrow, but it will most likely be next week. We don't anticipate traveling until mid to late January at this point. But, I'm sure that will help with the cost of airfare and help our little ones here at home adjust to the new idea. It would have been hard for me to leave them over Christmas, anyway, so I am glad that I won't have to deal with that emotion on top of everything else!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
17 comments:
Oh, wow-- I had a feeling that it must be something more than a court delay that was causing your silence, and I've been praying for you ever since you left the comment on our blog. We will continue to pray for you & your peace with this situation, and for baby Z & his future.
Mager Family,
We have been thinking of you, and of course wondering what could be happening.I can't imagine how hard this must have been. We will be praying for peace in your hearts.
Shawn & Lisa :)
I am so sorry. My heart hurts for you and your family. I can not begin to imagine the sadness you must have felt over the last couple of weeks. I pray that when pictures and information arrives about your little 1 month old that your heart will be filled with joy...that your heart will have more joy than sadness. I admire the strength in your writing.
Peace,
Amy
I am so sorry. My heart breaks for you. It is wonderful though that God can give us peace in hard times when we trust His will is best.
Forsbergs
So sorry....I pray for comfort for you and strength. God's plan is so hard for us to see at times but you will look back one day and understand. He is good all the time!
Jill
Whoa! I don't know what to say...sorry isn't the right sentiment but I'll say it anyway.
You are incredibly strong and I know things will work out according to God's plan.
Magers,
We are so sorry for this part of the journey...thank you for your honesty about the hurt and the hope you have in God's plan. We're looking forward to see what God does in the midst of this!
Thinking of your family and wishing you all the best--
Jennifer N.
Wow, so sorry. We wish your family all the best.
We're thinking of you! Saying prayers for Baby Z and the new little one.
Stacie D.
Uhg. I am so sorry to hear your news. I kind of suspected as much.It seems like there is no way to prepare for this. You have to let your heart go to your child, and your heart won't wait until it's legal. In all of it, God is still sovereign. What a bittersweet time for your family. I'm trusting in His goodness and the perfection of His plans for you and Baby Z and for your baby.
so sorry to hear about this- that is just heartbreaking.
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Such sadness. Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers....
Mager Family,
I have been off my computer for a while and had not visited you lately. I am so sorry for your hurt and sadness. I can only imagine how hard it must be.
I will be praying for your family. Hopefully you have alll the info on your new little one by now. I am looking forward to hearing all the details.
Blessings,
Julie
Oh wow - I have been praying for your family for awhile now. I kind of had a feeling something wasn't quite right. I'm so sorry for all of you, my heart breaks. Praying for a quick referral package and a smooth court case. Your attitude shines the heart of Jesus - His plan is perfect. Praying for peace in this storm.
I will keep you in my prayers :)
Have you gotten any word on your little one month old? Just thinking of you and hoping that this little child is bringing joy to your heart...especially after such a hard loss.
Amy
Post a Comment