Referral --- Merry Christmas to us!

Finally, we officially received our new referral. Baby A is a 3 month old boy, healthy, and paper ready! Sharon, the director of the Ethiopia program, called us herself on Christmas morning to give us the news. We were so thrilled and appreciative that she would take time out on her holiday, even while she was out of town with family, to call us and give us this wonderful Christmas gift! ... YEAH!!!!

My perfect timing must not be His!

Yesterday, December 12, was our 10 year wedding anniversary. I told God that would be a great day to get the call for our new referral. I even told Him that it would be perfect timing! Laughingly, I also told Him that He probably doesn't care what my perfect is, because His ways are higher than mine. I guess He proved me right....No call yesterday...or today, for that matter! Oh, well, there's still tomorrow (before another long weekend waiting!).

By the way, though, we did have a great day celebrating. We left work early, skipped church, and had a free babysitter. It was a fun night of movies, fine dining, and Christmas shopping. Just perfect to be together (alone) for a change!

Time to Break the Silence

I have taken the last 2 weeks to sort through my feelings on what I am about to share, so I'm very sorry for the silence. The day after Thanksgiving, the director of the Ethiopia program called and told us that things had not gone well in court. The court did not rule in our favor. There was an issue with the birth family (nothing to do with our papers or our agency). Unfortunately, Baby Z will not be coming home to live with us; but I do hope that he will be reunited with his family and sibling.

That has been my prayer for him since the day we learned of the details surrounding his relinquishment. I believe God placed him in our hearts for the last two months so that we could pray the will of the Lord over his life. Despite sounding like a platitude, I truly do trust that God's will has been done in this situation.

Our family has grieved somewhat over the loss. In fact, I have felt similarly to what I experienced after my miscarriage. Although I did not know this baby, he already lived in my heart and so the loss was real. His name, his pictures, the things around the house that were bought especially for him, and the hope of bringing him home for his 1st Christmas...those things were all very real to us and had to be laid at the foot of Jesus, trusting that He is enough for us and for that little one. I have to believe that His Heavenly Father loves him more than we or his birthparents ever could. That is why I trust that this story will have a good ending for Baby Z.

In the meantime, we have been offered a referral for a one month old. We are currently awaiting the remainder of the medicals so that the agency can officially present us with the referral package. I am hoping it will be tomorrow, but it will most likely be next week. We don't anticipate traveling until mid to late January at this point. But, I'm sure that will help with the cost of airfare and help our little ones here at home adjust to the new idea. It would have been hard for me to leave them over Christmas, anyway, so I am glad that I won't have to deal with that emotion on top of everything else!